Posts tagged lol
u just dont ask someone with winged eyeliner why they are late for something
Go get a manicure, go shopping, treat yourself
We’re going clubbing Rumi (via pomegranatediaspora)
So we have an Italian exchange student at our school. And he and I were hanging out and he saw a pony, and he tried to show me but he didn’t know what it was called so he just pointed at it and said “Look, the compressed horse.”
And then he just grinned at his complete understanding of the English language.
dating tip: at a restaurant? move the chair for her to sit down, pour a glass of water for her, do everything for her. chew her food and then regurgitate it into her mouth like birds do for her.
my sister just tried to ask me if i wanted to go to bed but instead it came out “Do you need to use the sleep?”
and then she just kinda looked really horrified at herself and whispered
"Maybe i need to use the sleep"
Ayah's first day of Ramadan
- Ayah: Fasting is so hard!
- Me: You're eating cookies...
- Ayah: Yeah it was too hard for me. Allah understands, I know He does.
- Me: Yeah? How?
- Ayah: Because I thought I ate all these cookies but then when I walked by they were sitting right there opened! Allah would have hidden them if He didn't want me to eat them.
- Me: What if it was some sorta test?
- Ayah: Allah would never test me with cookies, He knows me better than that.
what do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?
or ernest hemingway